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Building Confidence In Children Begins With You!

Author : Mark Arens

Submitted : 2010-05-10 08:56:48    Word Count : 880    Popularity:   141

Tags:   Self Esteem, building confidence in children, children confidence building, healthy self esteem

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We need to be keenly aware of how we are building confidence in children. A child with poor confidence will most likely have an incredibly low self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem is a child's armor against the challenges of the world. Kids who feel good about themselves have an easier time handling conflicts and make better judgments when it comes to behavior. Kids who have confidence tend to smile more, make eye contact and just generally get more enjoyment out of life. In contrast, kids with low self-esteem carry more anxiety and frustration; they think poorly of themselves and lack the confidence to try new things. Their first reaction to most challenges is, "I can't."

"Confidence" is defined as, "freedom from doubt; belief in yourself and your abilities; Also, a feeling of trust." We can play an important role in building confidence in children. Patterns of self-esteem and confidence start at a very early age. Even simple milestones in a toddler's life bolster confidence. So, how can we, as parents, help our children confidence building? Here are a few of my favorite ways:

1. Be a positive role model. Kids learn by what they see. If you are critical of yourself, they will learn that behavior. Try to be positive and confident in your own life, and your kids will mirror your actions.
2. Watch your words. Kids are very aware and incredibly sensitive to the words their parents use. Remember to praise them, not only for a job well done, but for the effort they put into it. Use only words that will continue building confidence in children rather than condescending, sarcastic phrases. Keep in mind that your words are powerful and that they will linger in your child's heart much longer than you'll remember saying them.
3. Play with your child. Your love will go a long way to boost your child's confidence. Tell them you are proud of them, and give praise frequently. Hug your kids, hold their hand and skip, have tickle fights; just show your kids you love them!
4. Help your kids become involved in activities that build their confidence. Enroll your children in preschool, get them involved in sports, or take an art class together. Discover their gifts and talents together.

The list could be much longer, but these are just a few I thought were necessary to bring to the forefront. When we are talking about our children confidence building activities should be on the top of our "to do" list. After I noticed my son's confidence lacking, I spent extra time with him helping him learn to read. Every night Ryan and I read books together for however long he needed to tackle one of our "beginning to read" books. I told him over and over how proud of him I was, and how impressed I was at how hard he was working. It took Ryan about two weeks before he was reading easy books. Now, just over two months later, he is reading confidently; and magically! Ryan is back to his self-assured, upbeat five-year-old ways.

All these words are empty, however, if we don't encourage our children to build their self-esteem and confidence in Jesus Christ. Living life with the intent to honor and glorify God gives us purpose more significant than just aiming to satisfy those earthy goals. When we point our focus towards God, we aren't as easily affected by disappointment and failure. We know we are precious, perfect, children of God; no matter how we perform.

By building confidence in children we can encourage them to know and believe that God loves and desires their heart as well. He doesn't care whether they are skinny, athletic or smart; He loves them for who they are on the inside. I can't think of any behavior I would rather my kids model than that of the hopeful, joyful, positive outlook on life I receive because of my relationship with Jesus Christ.

Author's Resource Box

Mark Arens, the man with a heart for kids, a hand for parents and a thumbs up for families, is expanding his ThumbPeople company with Curricu-Thumb! ThumbPeoples, Thumbuddy Club Christian curriculum brings the affirming thumbprint character, Thumbuddy, to preschoolers with added benefit of providing parents with experiential knowledge of how to build confidence within their children! Come check it out: http://www.BuildingConfidenceInChildren.com

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