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How To Organize Your Priorities To Achieve A Work/Life Balance

Author : Tony Richards

Submitted : 2010-08-30 10:01:24    Word Count : 1184    Popularity:   131

Tags:   work/life balance, self confidence, self esteem, self help, how to achieve work life balance, balance in life, Tony Richards, motivation, work balance, life balance, yoga, meditation

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Creating the best work/life balance can be one of the most difficult juggling acts for many people to get right. Apart from any recognised difficulties that will be exposed, there is also the dilemma that for each person the balance will be different.

The majority of people would choose to devote more time to family and recreational activities. Then again, there may be a need for some others to balance that desire with a need to be more productive in their jobs. Although, I doubt that many people have gone to their graves wishing they had spent more time at work meetings.

The intent here will not be to demonstrate what the best balance is. Rather, the aim will be to allow each person to have enough self-confidence to find the balance that will suit them best. That will be done by explaining how self-confidence works, how it is connected to finding each person’s balance, and providing a process that will deliver the self-confidence to bring it all together.

Self-confidence is the mental attitude of having trust in, respect for, and reliance on, your own judgement and/or abilities. It embodies the confidence you have in yourself, and it can develop through two different streams. The first stream is via achievements and the many other external providers.

Those providers, associated with a work/life balance of merit, could in part include family support, a satisfying career, outside interests, genuine friends and financial security. Naturally if all of those providers are in place you’re already doing quite well for yourself.

However, even if all those supporting providers of external self-confidence are available, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve got them balanced in the right proportions to satisfy all your needs.

Further to any acknowledged work/life conditions that could provide self-confidence, it is possible that some favourable conditions exist that have not yet been recognised. They may even be desires sought, and believed unattainable.

That brings us to how self-confidence is connected to getting the work/life balance to a place where, for ongoing happiness and success, you are enjoying all the benefits.

Self-confidence gives you the ability to satisfy yourself that you have correctly prioritised all of the areas of your life and work. Prioritising all associated work/life issues exposes the best balance, thus creating a more relaxed state of mind.

Further, self-confidence will allow you an opportunity to discover many areas within your life that can be added to the balance, for prioritising.

That discovery will be completed by exposure to the second stream of self-confidence. That stream is the internal development process, which will assist you to learn more about yourself. Internal self-confidence development will expose all the areas you may want to balance, and prioritise, and utilise for ongoing happiness.

The difference between the two streams of self-confidence is that one is delivered by achievements, balanced with all the other external providers against any perceived failures. The other stream delivers a mental attitude of belief in your self-worth and abilities that remains unshakeable irrespective of any self-imposed limits for success.

Both streams are important; however to establish the best work/life balance we need them to work in unison. The reason for that lies in the strength of our natural abilities to overcome the enemies of self-confidence. All of our achievements, business successes and support from others for our abilities, can build some defences against self-doubt, uncertainty and fear.

On the other hand those supporting comments, successes and achievements often need to be repeated constantly to maintain that defence. Consider how those enemies attempt to control us, and you can see the difficulties we can have in maintaining a defence against their destruction of our self-confidence.

Self-doubt is usually imposed by the comments of others. As an example, you have a busy schedule planned for work that will include a presentation. You’ve dressed nicely, and you’re getting breakfast for your children before rushing off. No matter how young they are if one of them asks, “Is that what you’re wearing for work?” and then glances at their sibling, who says nothing, self-doubt can pounce.

It is difficult to imagine anyone not wanting to check their attire, at least once, before leaving the house. Further inspections of clothing are probable before the presentation. However, other scenarios could come into effect.

The first one is where colleagues comment on how nicely you’ve dressed for the presentation. Those comments, depending on a combination of nature and nurture factors, will commence or complete the barrier building process against self-doubt.

The second scenario is where a colleague – you only need one – asks,
“Is that what you’re wearing for the presentation?” Forget the presentation; if it was me, I’m going home.

However, let’s assume there have not been any comments from anyone, and the time for the presentation is approaching. This is where uncertainty can begin its work. Uncertainty, closely related to self-doubt, is often a figment of our own thoughts and does not require any comments from others.

The presentation will, on this occasion, require public speaking and the often associated onset of fear. Reinforcement from others, along with positive reminders from our own thoughts of previous success during public speaking can, in the short term, build some barriers against that uncertainty and ensuing fear. However, even if we can constantly achieve, and have that reinforced by our own thoughts, and by positive comments from others, there can be further difficulties.

The self-confidence enemies, uncertainty, self-doubt and fear, may not be working alone to disrupt our thoughts leading up to the presentation. The enemies of self-confidence represented by conflict of conscience, guilt and arrogance will not be affected by our achievements, or the comments of others.

Those enemies can affect everything else in our lives, by concentrating our thoughts on other internal issues that have been bothering us. As examples, those three enemies can work by creating conflict of conscience over why we haven’t previously developed an appropriate work/life balance.

Further, they can create guilt about how much effort we may have put into getting the balance right. Finally, they can encourage us to arrogantly ignore the pleading of family, friends or colleagues about their feelings of neglect. They too want to share your time and company. They probably like you.

It is only the internal development processes that can effectively overcome all self-confidence enemies as one. They develop, and deliver, self-confidence at the same time. Therefore to get the balance between the streams of self-confidence correct – and we will – it is important to explain how the internal development process works…

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Tony is a Personal Development Consultant from Australia, who travels the world conducting private consultations, seminars, speaking engagements, and successful business training on managing self-confidence. He is particularly sought after by those seeking to improve relationships in their personal and professional lives.

Tony has produced an eight book series on Self-Confidence. Each book individually deals with specific stages of life. However, the real benefit of the series is that apart from explaining how Self-Confidence works, they all include Tony’s proven processes for how to gain, and maintain, Self-Confidence forever.

Tony Richards-Author of “Self-Confidence for…“ Series
Expert Personal Development Consultant, Speaker & Business Trainer

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